A very long time friend of ours has returned to this area after many years on the East Coast. She came back to care for her mother in the last of her life, has completed that phase and has some time on her hands to come visit me for a day or needle work and chat. We did that yesterday. As an outspoken lesbian from way back in the day, she has taken a road to this time and place that has been full of pot holes and damaged bridges. The conversation she had with Mr. Zen yesterday spoke volumes about that journey. So why is Billy Porter gracing the front of this diary? Come on in.
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Monday Crimson Quillfeather
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A tiny part of a much larger conversation about gender identity vs sexual preferences, what LGBTQIA means, why it matters whether someone is called a queer or owns being a queer, where does the term CIS come from and mean, Mr. Zen was commenting on Billy Porter and his clothes. He had no idea who Porter is or where he comes from, and neither did I. Mr. Zen asked why he was wearing women’s clothes. KK looked at him calmly and said “Why are they women’s clothes? No woman has owned them, worn them. They are not women’s clothes, they are Billy Porter’s clothes.”
“They are Billy Porter’s clothes.” That statement really rang in my mind. I see lots of folks in my chapel when I perform weddings. I have never had a gay (male) couple that presented as anything but male. But I have had numerous lesbians couples where one wore what I thought of as men’s clothes, presented themselves as masculine but not trans and I realized that I put the label on their attire as male when in fact it was just Them. None of them chose to be called “Husband” but instead opted for “Wife”. Her choice, her mental image of herself, totally outside the rubric of male or female, just “This is me, these are MY clothes.” I will have to rethink how I see these folks, how I think about them. Every time, I am inclusive, supportive, welcoming of them but I am still learning how to understand all the people I interact with on a personal basis. Human sexuality and gender identity are much more complicated than most of us realize.
You can go to google and see lots of pictures of Mr Porter in the most amazing clothing you will ever see. I did not want to steal copyrighted pix of such a famous person but it is worth the search. I don’t know much about him having just become of aware of him, but more power to him and his choices. He is a striking looking individual, the camera loves his face and stances. I love his fashion.